SERIOUSLY GUYS can a person get more perverted than this?!!

it is either i have become too lazy or ean has brought tonnes of bad luck to this blog!

it has been 3 weeks since my last update..not GOOD..

but im back with a bang!

well, maybe not a HUGE bang, perhaps a small one..

or a moderate and digestable bang filled with sordid details of XXX..(i know u like it..everybody likes sordid details of XXX)

call me a pervert, but lately i just keep having the flashes of images of a certain 'look' in my brain.

the visions of soccer players..

well to set matters straight im not really a fan of this sport.

what i mean by that is i dont really care about the game, the strategy, the leagues, cups or whatever...however from time to time, i do pretend to watch it with my straight friends..(or those who also pretend to be intrigued by the game)

why i do this? thats a million dollar question...just to be part of the macho, testosterone filled alpha males i guess.

while the others are participate in face turning to red from the rage of supporting their teams, i actively admire the perfect male form in shorts...

now coming back to the flashing images in my brain..my most favourite part of a match is when the players come out to the field adjusting their shorts and of course their errr crown jewels..whoopss!

call me a pervert but i not going to deny it..my next favourite moment comes when a player gets substituted..

if we notice, there comes the act of adjusting shorts and balls again..the most captivating moment is when a player jumps in to tackle the ball!

NOW NOW!! this is when the butt slides on the grass and the shorts go all over the place and most often exposing sexy legs and jockstaps..

ooohh mama!! the viewing pleasure further is heightened when the field wet and the player is wearing white shorts..

just orgasmic!!

but these dont make the images that keep flashing in my brain.

imagine the soccer player stretching in the field, legs wide open...and wide by my definition is so wide that the shorts are stretched and exposed to the point that a big cat can play hide and seek in it....

ok..now imagine that the cat is a metaphorical cat..
metaphorically the cat is my hand..well metaphorically exchanging the word hand to cat somehow makes me seem a little less perverted..

YOU'LL SEE WHY!!

'THE CAT' which has been really hungry is mesmerized by the 'aroma' or the soccer players legs (which im going to call: 'THE FISH')....the cat gets hungrier and tells itself: HMM! I THINK I NEED TO GO HUNTING!

slowly the cat goes near the  fish...
first smelling the droplets of water (sweat) on the muscular fish..the salty aroma of the fish further triggers the cats mind.. the cat gets hungrier>>not that the cat could help it.

then the cat says to itself: HMM MAYBE I SHOULD PLAY WITH THE FISH..afterall its the fish who was all delicious and flexing its delicious muscles that sent the cat into a hormone raging being.

so the cat grabs the fish by its calf. and licks it..and says: HMM WET, SALTY and REALLY hard >>>calf!

curious, the cat goes slightly higher and it notices more muscles and more water droplets..

i mean what can a helpless can do with so much temptation, right? in the cats mind, it tells itself: OF ALL THE FISH IN THE SEA, SOCCER PLAYER FISH HAS THE NICEST MUSCLES! ..

of course by this time the cat is already overwhelmed with sensation..and not to forget the raging hormones

it goes further up and notices some coconut. 2 to be exact. thinking hard, it says to itself: HMM MAYBE IM SUPPOSED TO PUT MY STRAW AT THE CENTRE...IN THE VALLEY CONNECTING BOTH THE COCONUTS..

but a cat is not that intelligent...thus it decides to continue the exciting and wonderful journey it has experienced this far...still walking in the valley between the coconuts...it hits 2 small bumps..but these bumps are not as big as coconuts..in fact they are just as big as grapes..

in a very big confusion, the cat asks it self: SERIOUSLY GUYS can a person get more perverted than this?!!