it says: hey dude, how are you?. been a long time since we spoke.
even though i was mind numbingly bored at that time, i still hesitated to reply to that text.
to begin with, each sms i send to him would cost me 50cents about 4 times the cost of an sms i send to my malaysian friends.
that night, the cost was the least of my concern.
it was the drama. the drama between me and him and the drama between me and....well obviously the rest of the world...
ironically, this guy is a person i began chatting with in a gay chatroom.
yes, gay chatroom. by the way, he is actually straight guy.
straighter than the arrow so to speak or so he claims to be.
so what was he doing in that chatroom??
lets just say: im still looking for an answer for that one.when we first began to chat, he was just in his teenage years. he had lotsa things going on at that time.
Ah Longs knocking on his doors, parents fighting with one another, schooling, his friends back stabbing and already being engaged to his girlfriend at the age of 19>>just to name a few.
i dont know what made me believe in his stories. they were always over dramatic. keyword being OVER.
yet 4 years down the road we still keep in touch.
maybe i wanted to offer him moral support since his life was so fucked up.
well, coming back to the sms...
from the beginning our friendship wasnt the one i cherish the most. it was always a case of me saying something, then he says something, then i get pissed, i ignore him, he appologizes we make up and repeat..
at first it was fine then became monotonous and redundant...
add that with my own problems and issues and it became overwhelming even to reply his smswhy??
because i am fast becoming saturated with all the happenings around me.
im in need of a happy place and quick. a retreat so to speak. to let loose, release and revive.
unfortunately i dont have it....
AM I SCREWED FOR GOOD THIS TIME??
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