Its All About Confidence

confidence could a bitch to someone..for others its a definite bitch. working in a constant rat race, competing with one another, is confidence a skill to be cultivated or is it an inborn trait...?

if it could be cultivated, could it be bred through training. we have all seen shameless advertisements claiming to boost a persons confidence buy a change of clothes, appearance and speech skills. does it really work, i cant tell..but all these qualities, do they guarantee a person's confidence or is it just a marketing buzz milking the general population's weakness?

In my opinion, i think is it the experiences that we go through that makes one a confident person...

consider this:

in a room full of people, where someone has to present his ideas, standing erect, eyes looking at the audience, continuous, stutter free, smooth speech and able to respond to all the questions rasied mark the traits of a confident man....

it is not a secret, but a successful presentation also consists of THE ART OF INTIMIDATION...yes, intimidation...bet to differ...? i guess not

in the line of my work, certain clients can be fussy and irritating over mediocre things...they instigate their thoughts even when it is not applicable and not necessary in the project execution.just because it worked in one project, it doesnt mean it will work on others...

if i were to represent my company in such meetings, i play by MY rules....

the old school teaching of the client is always right.....well lets just say thats not my believe system.

i think, if im right, i would say it, and i should say it even in the presence of the paymaster.... 

do i practice intimidation....yes, i do...only when the other party is not reasonable..some of the tricks up my sleeves include looking straight in the eye of the talker, not blinking and almost staring, making small chuckles when the talker is explaining abstract concept, exhaling, finger tapping on the meeting table, leaning far back on the chair with crossed leg and frowning, let the talker to finishing presenting his elaborate idea and in a calm monotonous way saying no are just some of the things that works in a meeting...

im not proud of these but lets be honest here....i know what im doing, im good at it and my company specializes in what we do...so why should i let anyone else to second guess my designs??

im a sensible person, open for ideas and constructive criticisms..but in return, i expect the client to be technically sound when he questions my decision..a small tradeoff..otherwise hes just wasting both party's time....

in some situations...it does come down to who can be more intimidating than others..but being technically sound makes a huge difference...

>>why talk about all of these out of the blue??

i was in a meeting with a vendor and this guy has years of experience ahead of me. i made queries regarding the status of the project and he stumbled for words and arranging his thoughts...

maybe he was nervous or genuinely has no idea of whats going on...i DID NOT intimidate him...i didnt even try.

so this guy, he was not able to sell his ideas to me. not only that, i had to dismiss him on the basis that he failed to convince me with his ideas. 

it goes both ways, maybe his ideas we really not that good, or he was not confident it conveying those ideas...either way, todays meeting was a waste of time.

so is confidence a skill to be cultivated or is it genetics?

i think the models in the pictures are darn confident to be dressed in just their underwear...!