Twice was the limit, not anymore PLEASE

woke up really early yesterday to go to putrajaya to settle some urgent things. i didnt sleep well the night before. i must have been busy doing some serious important stuff to be awake till 2.30am when i knew i had to leave at 7.30am to putrajaya>>u might think..

if anyone knows me any better, they would tell how untrue that is. i was up and surfing the net for god knows wat and it went on till 2++.

so the next morning high spirited and slightly sleepy i went to putrajaya and finished everything within an hour (very proud of myself). reaching home, i saw the sight of my notebook, seducing me from catching up with sleep..

then comes the memory of downloading movies and series from my office computer (everybody does that!) and then i gave up..

had to watch at least one movie. went through my collection and then i saw it: AMPHETAMINE was looking at me innocently and telling me : u want me and u know it!..

i remember watching permanent residence at Simon's place sometime last year (he downloaded it as well) and the first time i watched it, i got so depressed that i couldnt do anything naughty with Simon after that (Simon is my good friend who lives in Pantai) until Simon had to give me the lecture of what happened to them is not necessarily applicable in my case. Simon is a nice guy.

so i was torn again, given the slight headache and history of SCUD's super depressing movie, i was confused but i clicked the movie anyway.

i think Amphetamine could have been made in a less depressing way. it was interesting the way Daniel approached Kafka and him having the maturity of not having sex with Kafka when Kafka was vulnerable in the shower. it was also interesting when Daniel said that he wants to protect Kafka and not let anyone hurt him given the state of loneliness Kafka was at...

i just would have preferred if somehow these two would have found a way to work things out. in some weird little way it would have given so many a little shine of light.

it was a movie about two person who met, fell in love and couldnt find a way to work things out. two movies in the same genre, im getting a little bored. even a little less enthused for the third installment. if the same formula is used, im pretty damn sure it would be stale.

i wish SCUD would stop making depressing movies and instead make a realistic one with realistic issue of faithfulness, cultural and social acceptance, lifestyle, support groups, future, hobbies and focus on how to life instead of vividly depicting how to commit suicide..

its just a thought..there are too many depressing movies out there and a gay one need not be sad as well. if he succeeds making a realistic movie about success story in a gay relationship, im sure it would be so much easier to convince the world that gay relationship too is a meaningful and lasting and is not about sex 99.9% of the time not only to regular folks but also to gay men.

"the day i stop loving you, is the day my eyes are closed forever"